It's out of my hands now.

Here is a hard fact: Most people aren't making enough money to make ends meet.  We are EXTREMELY lucky to have food stamps and Metro (HUD Section 8) help so most of our housing and food is subsidized, because if we didn't, we'd be forced to live with my parents.

To this end, teh_Bagder and I decided to submit a Social Security Disability application for me.  Since these headaches are so frequent and having such bad symptoms with them, I cannot work - heck a 30 minute shopping trip to the grocery store often causes a migraine or panic attack.  Who would hire someone like me, that frequently needs to cower in a dark cool room for several hrs at a time with little or no warning.  Heck, I'm on probation with my Psychiatrist, as they have the 3 strike rule - if you miss 3 appointments (or cancel in under 24 hrs) they will no longer see you.  At least the office lady, bless her, isn't counting the times I was in the ER or on my way to the ER for a migraine for the 3 strike rule. Or I would be hunting for a new one right now.

We know stress is one of my migraine triggers, as is overly bright lights.  We know a few of my triggers, but a good portion of my migraines don't seem to have triggers.  Same thing with the anxiety and panic attacks.  Sometimes we know what triggers one, but other times we have no clue.  It is very disconcerting to wake up in the middle of the night having a seriously bad anxiety attack.  It has happened a few times, the worst one almost felt like it was a heart attack (chest pain, tingling left arm, those kind of symptoms)  and my rescue meds take about 30-45 min to kick in, so I had to lay there and relax until those meds had time to take effect.  I clock watched, because if after the 45 min I was still having the chest pains, I would have woken teh_Bagder and told him that we needed to go to the ER again.

Some friends and family think we should put the elder 2 back into brick and mortar schools so I wouldn't get stressed over their school work.   Actually, having them home is less stressful.  No worry about bullies to break glasses (happened twice - school did absolutely nothing), or to ridicule the fact that Munchkin was in special math and reading classes for super-bright kids (again, school did absolutely nothing). And here they have more time to eat lunch. The drama I got when they got home was a LOT more stressful than me keeping them home to school them here.  Also, with Munchkin and Buddy here most of the time, when I get a migraine that I have to seclude myself in a dark, cool room to wait for my meds to kick in, Monkey has people to keep a watchful eye on him.  Knowing that he will be kept safe while I am pleading for my meds to kick in faster, is a stress relief.